


The Art Of Falling

by AlexTheShipper



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Deaf Clint Barton, Flirting, Lip reading, M/M, Mentions of past dub con, SHIELD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-09
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-13 17:47:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4531272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexTheShipper/pseuds/AlexTheShipper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint misses a shot, and according to his recruitment anything less than perfection will lead to incarceration.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Art Of Falling

Clint was falling when he released the arrow, a shot he'd taken a hundred times, only this time, he misses. The instant of hesitation when he saw Coulson struggling with three assailants, and he missed. The grab for the grappling hook is an automatic response and he swings himself onto a nearby roof.

"Goodbye Coulson." He whispers into the com's unit.

"Clint, where are you going?" Coulson's voice rings in his ears as he drops the com. He doesn't hesitate to break into a civilian apartment and steal clothes, and then he drops down to the street, buys a hat and goes to collect his bag. For the first time in almost a decade Clint doesn't have a home base.

...

"Goodbye Coulson." Clint's voice rings over the com's, quiet, but clear.

"Clint, where are you going?" Coulson demands. A moment later, the com can be heard hitting the ground. "Fucking, hell Clint." Coulson growls, and someone stalks up to him.

"Has the Hawk finally flown the coup?" He growls. Coulson rolls his eyes.

"I don't have time for this bullshit." Phil takes the guy out in three moves, and calls for extraction. Something has gone wrong, and Phil is going to find out what.

Phil stalks into the control room with his agent Coulson face on, the one that makes the junior agents think he's an android.

"I need all the video on Hawkeye before he disappeared." He snaps at a junior agent.

"Yes Sir." The agent says, quickly compiling the data. Phil settles in to watch. Everything seems fine, completely normal, until the moment Clint releases an arrow, and it misses. Which is admittedly bad, Phil would expect some problems, Clint dropping off the map wasn't one of them though.

"Sir, are you okay?" The junior agent asks.

"Fine." He says, voice sharp. He heads for Fury's office.

"Cheese, what are you doing here?" Fury asks, feet propped up on his desk.

"I need to take some vacation time." Phil explains. Fury raises an eyebrow in question. "I'm going to bring Clint back, hopefully."

"Did you figure out why he ran off?" Fury asks, his feet his the floor, and he gives Phil his full attention.

"He missed a shot." Coulson offers. "It's the only catalyst I can see."

"Good luck finding him Cheese. It took you a long time last time." Fury says. "If you need help, just come in."

"Thanks. I'm gonna need all the luck I can get." Phil grumbles. Phil breaks into Clint's apartment, only to find Natasha already there.

"Phil? Next time knock." She says, returning to her search. "Anyways, did you figure out why Hawk left?"

"He missed." Coulson says, her back goes rigid.

"Missed, in the field?" She asks. Phil nods. A stream of Russian pours out of her mouth. "Slow down, and try it again in English." He scolds.

"Trust me, you don't want to hear that in English." She sayssays, smiling at him, and grabbing Clint's emergency bag. "I knew he was prepared for this, but that was years ago, I'd thought he'd settled by now." Coulson looks around the room, with it's blank walls, and SHIELD issue furniture.

"I'm not sure Clint knows how to settle." Phil sighs.

"No. I thought he'd settled into his place at SHIELD. I thought he'd forgotten about that crazy idea of his." She growls.

"What idea?" Phil asks.

"His idea that if he fucks up at all SHIELD will put him in prison." She says. "I told him it was stupid." Coulson frowns.

"Why would he think that?" Coulson asks. She shrugs.

"Something about his recruitment speech." She shrugs, and Phil pales. "Whoever did it told him his options were SHIELD or prison."

"What does the shot have to do with that?" Phil asks, trying to look less stricken than he does. "It's just one shot."

"Clint was hired because he never misses, he no longer lives up to that." She tells him. "Why do you think he practices more often then he breathes?"

"He likes archery?" Phil asks. Natasha rolls his eyes.

"Clint likes freedom, and you. I'm glad he hasn't lost all his sense and chosen you over freedom." She says flippantly. "Now I need to find my partner." She's gone before he can think of an adequate response. Leaving him in an empty apartment.

...

It takes him a month to find even a trace of Clint. When a human trafficker is found with an arrow in his heart in Chicago. There have been other cases, criminals killed by snipers, but this is the first case he's sure is Clint. He borrows a Quin-jet and leaves immediately, heading for Chicago.

"Have you seen this man?" Coulson holds up the photo. It's a last resort, when technology and gadgets can't find him. Coulson's been searching Chicago for days, and chances are good Clint's long gone. He's desperate, worried, but mainly, he's tired. Eventually he has to sleep.

...

Clint has been following Coulson around Chicago for over a week. There's been no sign of backup or reason for concern. The only person he's contacted is Natasha, who's been searching for Clint in Starling City. Eventually, be deems it safe, and breaks into Coulson's safe house.

"What?" Coulson's up before he's truly awake, and Clint is glad he took the man's gun already.

"Hi?" He offers, watching Coulson perk up.

"Clint?" He asks. Clint nods, his bow isn't drawn, but it's in his hands.

"You don't have backup." Clint states. It's not a question in itself, but he wants to know why.

"Of course not. I wasn't going to come get you with an army Clint." Phil says, as if that were obvious. Clint cocks his head to the side in question. "Why would you think that?"

"You told me my options when I joined Phil." Clint says. "You gave me two choices, I had three. One:" He holds up a finger. "Join SHEILD." He holds up another finger. "Two: Go to jail." He holds up a third finger. "Three: Join SHIELD until I was sure of my ability to evade capture. I'm sure."

"You joined SHIELD though. Why leave now?" Phil asks, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

"Again, you told me my options, but you also implied the requirements. I joined SHIELD because I'm a perfect shot. That's the only reason the job was offered to me." Clint shrugs. "I was told a lot during training that as long as I kept meeting goals I'd stay."

"Garrett said that to you?" Phil is scowling, and Clint's eyes widen slightly.

"Are you saying it's not true?" Clint isn't an open person, but there is so much undisguised hope in his voice.

"Yes!" Coulson sighs. "You are a fully functioning member of SHIELD. Even if you wanted to leave we wouldn't put you in prison." Clint's shock is completely heart breaking. "Why did you stay so long if this is what you expected?" Phil demands. Pulling his blanket back around him.

"Lot's of reasons. A big one being that SHIELD is _good_. Despite the position it put me in." Clint says, leaning against the dresser. "I was a mercenary. I had to kill to eat, but I had morals, your morals, and my morals matched. I like SHIELD. I like you." Clint's voice trails off, nearly silent.

"You shouldn't have left." Phil sighs. Clint doesn't smile his usual cocky grin.

"I've been living my life prepared to run for as long as I can remember. I didn't have any other options." Clint shrugs. "There's no should. I'm Hawkeye Phil, I can't survive in a cage."

"We wouldn't-" Phil begins.

"That's not the point. I thought you would. I've been with SHIELD over a decade, I've always thought this was coming." Clint growls. "I have lived for years expecting to be thrown in a jail cell if I did the wrong thing." Clint's hands are shaking.

"Clint. I would never allow you to be put in a cell Clint. Trust me." Phil whispers. "I do. I trusted what you told me that first day." Clint says.

"That's not what I meant. I never meant that we would put you in jail. I wasn't trying to coerce you to join SHIELD. I was trying to convince you." Phil is more on edge than Clint has ever seen him. "I meant that you'd wind up in jail, we never would have put you there." The urge to defend his own thoughts isn't as strong as the urge to calm Phil. He doesn't bother answering, instead he places a hand on Phil's arm and waits for their eyes to meet.

"I believe you." Clint says. Despite himself Phil calms down.

"I'm sorry, we didn't clear this up sooner." Phil says, staring at his toes.

"When I first got to SHIELD, I was just glad I'd never have to sleep with anyone to eat again. No way was I risking asking any questions." Clint says. "It's not your fault Phil."

"It is though, I recruited you. I'm the reason you lived like this." Phil says. Clint scowls.

"Phil if you hadn't recruited me chances are I'd be dead by now. Even as a mercenary I frequently pissed off those I worked for. Like I said I have morals. Morals and mobsters don't really mix." Clint forces Phil's attention back on him. "You saved my life Phil. I'm thankful for that. I'm so lucky to have you in my life." Phil sighs.

"I'm lucky you-" Phil yawns. "You're in my life too. Don't leave again." Clint smiles at his handler.

"I won't, you get some rest." Clint says, pushing Phil back onto the bed and tucking him in before leaving a cautious kiss on his forehead.

"M'kay." Phil sighs, and drifts to sleep.

...

Phil calls Natasha first thing after he wakes up, same as usual.

"Any new leads?" She asks, rather than a greeting.

"No, I had a dream he found me." Phil says, heading out into the kitchen. "New lead. He's in my safehouse. The dream was not a dream." Clint glances over his shoulder.

"Is that Nat? Tell her to say hi to Oliver for me." Clint says, turning back to his eggs.

"Not that asshole." Natasha whines.

"Are all archers assholes?" Phil asks teasingly.

"What are you talking about?" Clint says. "Everyone loves me."

"HA Lies!" Natasha yells, loud enough for Phil to flinch. "I was probably supposed to hear that. Nat you know I can't hear before I put my hearing aids in." Clint calls back. Phil tries not to let his jaw drop.

"You wear hearing aids?" Phil asks. Clint nods, turning away to begin serving them both. "How did we not know this?" Natasha laughs in his ear.

"I'm hanging up now Phil." She tells him, and the dial tone rings out.

"You weren't supposed to know. I didn't want it in my file." Clint says, shrugging.

"I'm supposed to know everything." Phil sighs. "I'm your handler."

"I wasn't comfortable with SHIELD knowing my weaknesses." Clint explains. "I've had hearing problems since childhood, I can read lips, sign, and I have hearing aides. It's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal." Coulson grumbles. "Look, we clearly have a lot to talk about, we should do it over lunch." Clint beams at him.

"Oh, I am so going to date the hell out of you Phil." Clint crows excitedly.

"That's not what I" Coulson tries to explain and Clint's smile drops. "Meant." He already regrets saying it.

"Oh, okay. Sorry, for you know. That." He waves a hand over his shoulder. Phil catches his eye.

"That's not what I meant, but I certainly wouldn't mind." Phil cuts in. Clint gapes at him.

"You're gonna kiss me now to prove you aren't fucking with me." Clint decides, stepping into his personal space. Coulson does, melting into the way Clint responds to his touch.

"Wow." Coulson sighs pulling away. "You've been keeping a lot from me Barton." Clint blushes.

"Shut up." Clint shoves at his shoulder.

"Fine, fine, but Natasha is going to kill you." Coulson teases.


End file.
